With much of the world in a state of upheaval due to the pandemic, growing wealth inequality, and climate change, humanity is facing a plethora of challenges that are threatening our existence and further undermining the efficiency of our global civilization.
It’s easy to blame systems, governments, corporations, capitalism for the problems we’re facing today, and in many ways it’s warranted and true. But who are we really pointing the finger at here? These things didn’t create themselves, we did. We created all of these things that we are against. So it begs the question, where did we go wrong?
For many years in my life, I saw all of these blemishes on human existence and history as separate from myself. After all, how am I responsible for anything that is outside of my control? And, truthfully, it’s not my fault, just as it’s not yours. But over time, I started thinking about what evil really is and how these systems came to be. And the truth is that we’re wired to create them.
In 1978, a study was conducted where happiness levels were tracked over time for lottery winners and accident victims who become paraplegics against a control group. What they found was astonishing: happiness levels normalize over time. For both the lottery winners and the accident victims, their happiness weeks or months later was about the same as it was before they won the lottery or were in a horrible accident. This concept is known as the hedonic treadmill or hedonic adaptation. And the key finding here is that happiness is relative. This is something that we know is true based on our own experience, yet many of us believe that our happiness is conditional upon an infinite scroll of things that we haven’t yet attained. For example, how happy were you when you got a new phone, new car, new job, or new lover, just to find that you were unhappy with those same things down the road?
The problem is that when we’re chasing happiness, we basically have no free will at all. Our actions and choices will always reflect what we think will make us more happy in the moment. We become impulsive dopamine addicts that are constantly living in a state of distress, chasing short-term gratification. We invest trillions of dollars in medications and treatment for depression instead of just accepting the fact that we will be depressed some times. I’ve been depressed for months before, and I know it can be so difficult, but have you ever felt at peace with not being happy? Is it okay not to be happy?
My point here is that the problem isn’t the systems — we are. The systems are just systems. But we use them at the expense of others in exchange for short-lived bursts of dopamine. And then we wonder why we feel depressed.
Our best selves do not act out of self interest. Our best selves are calm and compassionate; help others; notice the little things in life; stop to hear the sound of a bird; let people cut them off in traffic. This is the person we all want to be. But our thoughts get in the way because we have beliefs that don’t align with our best selves. Maybe we believe it’s weak or dumb to act like this. But who’s stronger and smarter — the person who lives chasing short-term gratification, or the person who’s okay with not feeling happy, taking time to breath and allowing life to unfold before them?
You can blame yourself, or you can blame your beliefs. And the truth is that your beliefs are to blame. You are not flawed, you’re perfect just the way you are. And you have an incredible gift. You were given a brief moment to experience something on a spec of dust in an expansive universe. It’s quite mind-boggling. None of us asked for this. And none of us will ever know why any of this exists at all.
But there’s something that becomes very obvious when you start to think about it. It feels good to be generous, vulnerable, go out of your comfort zone, and experience your own life fully. And it feels bad to be critical of yourself and others, find things that are not good enough, and clog the flow of life from taking place before your consciousness. Who are we to judge this creation that is so beyond our understanding and control? We show up here, and in a matter of years we’re already bitching and moaning about random shit all day long.
Humanity has been through so, so much to get to where we are today, and the reason why we’ve made it this far is because of our collective effort to grow, innovate and come together. Regardless of the challenges we face, we keep on striving for a better future. And I think that’s something to be genuinely stoked about. We must remember that ultimately, we’re responsible for the world we live in and the experience that we perceive. True growth lies within, and only we have the power to explore and cultivate that growth for ourselves. We are all capable, but are we willing?
